Tuesday 5 August 2008

Thoughts on thoughts

When I compare my blogs with others, I don't seem to post any serious thoughts. Then I realised that I don't have many serious thoughts, I just don't spend a lot of time thinking about life in general. I'll happily spend some time thinking about the best way of clearing the patch of stinging nettles and brambles at the bottom of our garden, but no-one will be interested in that.

A plan for the next few years of my life exists, and some of it is even written down, complete with the timescales that are currently envisaged. Much of what I hope to do, together with my wife, I hasten to reassure her, is dependent on circumstances beyond my control, and I long ago learned that worrying about things you can't control is the quickest way to an early grave (or cremation in my case).

So for the next few years (say, around 3 or 4) I'm in a kind of limbo where I can react to what happens in the family but not really direct it. Having realised that I'm in this position, I'm a tiny bit worried that I might get to like this condition and lose the will to really take control of the big things in my own life.

I also feel the need to learn something in a formal sense, but I'm not sure what or why. I guess I just feel that I could contribute a lot more than I do, or at any rate have recently. I shall post more on this topic in due course.

No comments: